This morning my wife voiced regrets about not being able to work on her anxieties. She feels I do not express concern for her problems and that I am not helping her get over them. I feel flattered. My wife would never opt for a me-too-strategy if she did not think I was making progress! Alas the progress was not good enough to handle this morning's proceedings properly.
She started talking about her anxieties in general, and, having ADD or perhaps, being a male, I took it literally. What she meant to say is that she needed help on taking the next step in a specific anxiety. I should have seen it coming but I didn't. Instead of offering help I challenged her to be more specific on the exact problems so I could devise a solution.
My second mistake was to project the evasive manoeuvres I myself make onto my wife. Having ADD I do not like criticism and I definitely do not like being made responsible for other people's happiness (or lack thereof). So, when my wife started to seek fault for her lack in progress in others, I did not comment (she deserves a break) but it did prevent me from listening. Stupid of me. I could quite easily have prevented an unnecessary discussion.
Today is also the day that I switched meds. Yesterday I tried to stop with Ritalin in the afternoon. Big mistake! I screwed up the quiche (from a packet!) and almost ended up in the wrong theatre. That last one caused me some stress because I did not want my daughter to be late for her play.
The new meds are working fine. Do not know how it will be tomorrow at work. I do know they seem to be working just fine, without any side effects.
Brandon
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